When I was in High School, one of the ways I would pass time is to go outside and hit the baseball. Living out in the country, with a few acres of land, we had a narrow strip about 300 feet long that was clear of trees so I could let ‘er rip. After one session that had gone particularly well, I shared with my mom that night that I realized that I was a baseball player. It was who I was, the identity that lay at the core of my soul and what I was supposed to do with my life. Even though I played one semester of Division III baseball, we know how my baseball life played out.
Our identity, who we are and how we define ourselves is an essential part of our life and being human. It is also an oddity that human beings are the only creature in this world that has to discover our identity. Every teenager goes through it, and many will struggle more than others. Our Blessed Mother, the Mother of God, shows us the way toward finding our own identity, who it is that we truly are.
When the Angel Gabriel first appeared to Mary, he greeted her as “Favored one,” and she concluded the encounter by saying “behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord.” In each case, her identity comes from her relationship to God. In the first, she is the Favored one of God, in the second, his handmaid. She is not simply a handmaid. Her relationship to God, and for The Virgin Mary, most especially, the Son of God, is essential to who she is. In fact, as St. Cyril of Alexandria wrote in the 5th Century and the Church has held ever since, Mary was first and foremost, the Theotokos (which means God Bearer) and the Mother of God. Everything that she was comes from her being the one favored to bring the Son of God into the world. She is also the Ark of the Covenant, Refuge of Sinners, Queen of Angels and Gate of Heaven. Who she is, and who we are, our true identity is always found in relationship. And this should not surprise us. We were made in the image of God, who is the Holy Trinity. God the Father, the Son, nor the Holy Spirit exists without relationship. If He has identified Himself by relationship, then isn’t that who we are, made in His image?
We may grasp at our identity according to what we do, how we dress, or how we define our sexuality. None of these things are who we are. Once again, Mary leads the way for us. Who she is, her identity is found in her relationship to God and to others. Our own identity, as we search, is always found in relationship and how we relate to others. Who are we father or mother to? Whose son or daughter do we claim to be? For me, I am a Priest of Jesus Christ; I am a Spiritual Director; I am the son of hand crafters, and brother of Kevin, among many other things. Who are you?
